Self Worth vs. Net Worth

You are not your money.

With jobs being lost and businesses closing down indefinitely right now, it is perfectly normal to be feeling a lot of financial uncertainty.

It feels as though it has become normal to tie the amount of money that we have to the way that we let ourselves feel. When money is flowing in, we feel on top of the world. When we experience a bump in the road (which we all do at some point), we might feel like a complete failure.

Money used to dominate and control my life, which is why I am sitting here typing this right now. I am not a financial expert, I have had plenty of financial failures and shortcomings, but I have learned some incredibly valuable lessons when it comes to controlling my emotions around money.

I can’t tell you that I can get a steady stream of money flowing into your bank account right now, but I can say that these few things will definitely help you in reframing and changing the way that you feel about money immediately.

You are not your money.

I said it already, and I will say it again. You are not your money! Your net worth might be taking a massive hit right now, and a natural reaction to this is to be exceedingly hard on ourselves in attempts to fix the situation.

Well… guess what?

Your net worth and your self-worth, who you really are, have nothing to do with each other!

If you are thinking “well, when I have some more money I will be confident in myself again but for right now it’s just too difficult to even see a way out”.

A way out of what? Your intrinsic worth, your inherent value, none of these things are damaged by a business going under or your portfolio falling off a cliff.

You still have the same skills, the same values, the same intellectual capital that you had before our most recent economic downturn.

If you are waiting for your financials to be perfect before you can experience worthiness, happiness and inner harmony, you might be waiting a moment or two.

Don’t delay happiness, don’t delay knowing the fact that even if you have absolutely nothing left right now, this does not make you any less of a person.

In fact, if you can find it inside of you to persevere and say “even though things might be tough right now, this won’t last forever and I’m going to stop playing victim to this situation.”

Your self-worth can only be damaged if you allow the lower part of you, the part that has been trained and conditioned to try to live and exist in today’s society, to take over and choose your thoughts.

Getting out of financial worry.

I will be completely transparent in saying that I know exactly what it feels like to wake up in the morning immediately worrying about money. This came from a scarcity complex that was buried somewhere deep in my unconscious mind, and it all began to make sense when I learned this one thing:

We are wired to do one thing – SURVIVE!

Oh… well that makes sense. No wonder people worry about money, because we tie it to our very own survival and existence.

The funny, ancient little part of our brain that is responsible for putting us in the “fight, flight or freeze” state begins firing off messages along the lines of this:

hello! I’m here to keep you alive and by making you worry about money right now I am doing the best job I know how. By the way, have you seen the economy today? WOW are things looking grim! Let’s forget the fact that there are tons of opportunities available to us right now, for the moment we need to focus on worrying. Lastly, here is a dramatic image of some future worst-case-scenario that I hope scares you into getting really rich so that we can worry about what would happen if someone came in the middle of the night and took all our money!”

Doesn’t it sound ridiculous? The same mechanism that used to keep us alive when there was a predator lurking in the bushes is the same one that, even though everything is probably perfectly okay, still sends this stress signal through our bodies?

The most important part of understanding this is that you are either in survival mode or creative mode, but you are not in both simultaneously.

The state in which we are playful and creative is far from “survivial mode”. Survival mode will keep us poor until we are willing to recognize what the patterns are that are playing in our unconscious mind.

EVERYTHING changed for me when it came to emotional management when I learned tapping, and I put together a short, free video to help people move out of the fight-or-flight state by communicating directly with the Amygdala (survival part of our brain).

Your ego loves to worry, your higher self does not

Any time you think a thought or make a decision, you are coming from one of two places: your lower self (also known as the ego self), or your higher self (also known as your true self AKA “who-you-really-are”).

My deepest purpose behind Alignment Club was to help people in connecting on a higher level to who they actually are, and cultivating decisions from their true self rather than the ego self.

The part that worries about how many likes you get on social media, what other people think, how much money you make in comparison to your neighbour, what material possessions you do or don’t have or whether or not you will ever be rich and famous is called your ego self.

The part of you that is infinitely more intelligent, knows exactly what is right for your in any given moment, literally guides you through difficult situations, and lives from a place of service for others is called your higher self.

If you are letting the ego chatterbox that never shuts up to call the shots, life is going to be miserable. If you take time daily to connect to your higher self, you will realize that most of what you worry about is often quite petty.

Work more diligently on changing your beliefs than you are working on trying to make money

If there is one thing I could tell my younger self, it would be this. Focus on changing the subconscious, on reframing the beliefs that you actually have about money right now. Consciously you might think you want it, but there may be something underlying in your subconscious that is keeping you from having it, keeping it, growing it and enjoying it.

Have you ever heard things like “money is the root of all evil”, “a penny saved is a penny earned” or “the only way to make money is through hard work”?

If we accept these as beliefs when we are young, which we often do, they will stick with us until we are willing to examine them and question whether they are factual or fiction.

We all have this cool thing called the Reticular Activating System (RAS) that filters out everything that does not line up with what we believe on a core level. So if you think money is hard to come by or incredibly scarce, you will constantly be finding evidence that your belief is actually true (even though it’s not).

If you have a pattern that goes up and down like a yo-yo (been there, many times), take a look at what you watched growing up as a child and the things you heard or observed around the topic of money.

Connecting with yourself on a deeper level and asking “what are the beliefs that are keeping me from having what I really, truly want?”

Money is a beautiful, unlimited tool that allows us to bring great life experiences to ourselves and other people around us, but it is nothing more than a tool!

Money isn’t the gateway to confidence, freedom or happiness. If you think that you will be so much happier once you have it in your possession, then maybe ask yourself why you aren’t happy right now in this moment? Ask yourself why you think that you aren’t good enough until you’re in possession of a large sum of money?

Lastly, make a list of things you do have in your life right now!

If you’re focused on how much money you don’t have, then it likely comes from scarcity or poverty conditioning. The more we focus on what we don’t have, the more we attract more situations and thoughts based around lack and scarcity.

What do you have right now? Are you healthy? Can you breathe properly? Do you have friends or family that are also healthy? Maybe you have some food in your fridge or freezer?

Maybe you don’t have the amount of money you want, but I bet you’re richer than you think.

Take into consideration the fact that over half the world lives on $2.50/day and that if you have just fifteen freaking dollars to your name you are in the top 8% wealthiest people in the world.

Stay safe, stay healthy, focus on what you do have right now, and what you do have will expand!

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